The world can feel like a dangerous place, especially for parents of a teenage daughter.  But there are some things that we can teach them to help them face it successfully.

Be Bold

Boldness is a reflection of self confidence. To look someone in the eye when talking to them.  To look someone in the eye when walking past them. To say no and mean it.  Firm and strong is the best option when we say no. However, some girls need to practice so give them the chance to do so. Help them learn to say no even when they are afraid of hurting someone’s feelings.   Help them to set up boundaries and consequences, such as “I said no, and if you do not stop I will leave/tell my parents/report you to the police.” Remind them to never back down from their NO. At home, allow them to talk about what they’re thinking even if you don’t agree with them. Listen to what they say and look them in the eye when you talk to them. Each time you do this, they will become more confident.

Better Safe than Sorry

Teach them to trust their guts.  The subconscious brain’s primary purpose is survival. When we feel weird about something or someplace, it may be our subconscious brain telling us something is wrong about the environment. In such situations, women/girls are typically told they are overreacting and to stop being so scared; but it actually is the brain doing its job.  So, help your daughters know that if something feels wrong, be aware and protect themselves. If they are wrong, that’s okay—better safe than sorry. Teach them to be aware of their surroundings. Remind them that ear buds in both ears are a terrible threat to safety and that focusing on their phones is a good way to become a target. Self-defense classes should be a requirement before they are allowed to date. Unfortunately, many dates can be a danger. Meet their friends, learn their names, maybe let them hang at the house where you can see how they treat your daughter.

You Deserve Better

Teach that your daughters shouldn’t ever allow the people in their life to treat them disrespectfully.  Sexual innuendos, jokes, or inappropriate pictures are all gateways to being a target.  Our girls deserve to be treated with respect so be sure to do so at home. When they are respected in their family life, they will notice if it doesn’t happen.  Making friends with strangers online is another risk so set up your family rules accordingly. Both people deserve to get to know each other in person.  Our brains do not recognize remote or cyber relationships as actual interactions with another person. Our girls deserve to feel important to a person sitting near them and watching them talk, listening to words and body language. It is only then that they will be able to judge whether they are truly safe or whether their safety is just an illusion.

As a parent the best thing we can do is pay attention to our daughters, make them our priority. It is through our actions that they learn their value and make decisions—including their safety—out of that overflow of love and care.